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Thursday, April 25 2024 @ 12:41 PM CDT

Who Will Be the Next Republican Caught With Their Pants Down?

Whited Sepulchers

Howie Klein

David Vitter is still hiding under his bed and refusing to talk to anyone.

{probably sucking on his pacifier and waiting for his prostitute nanny to change his dirty diapers!}
One of the prostitutes he's hired-- not for a quickie but for a three year stretch of infidelity-- told about the sweet relationship they had, although it did cause her to break up with her boyfriend. But she did say that she sometimes worried about Vitter's grotesque hypocrisy, even if he didn't. "Yow characterized the senator as a good man but said she was perturbed that he portrayed himself as a politician who would bring moral authority to his office when he was using her services on the side." Basically Vitter would like to say the pass he got from God for his transgressions regarding the DC Madam was a pass that covers all his decades of philandering with prostitutes everywhere. And, in case that isn't admissible in a court of law, he also points out that he had no ownership or managerial role in the Canal Street whore house he was frequenting. Oh, ok-- I guess that makes him eligible to still run Giuliani's campaign in the South.

Yesterday we mentioned that the North Carolina Republican lunatic who ran around his office with his pecker in his hand, chasing some poor legislative assistant while screaming she should perform fellatio on him had the decency to resign after just a week of prodding from fellow wingnuts who were embarrassed that his hypocrisy as a good Republican family man would rub off on their images as well.

But what North Carolina Republicans figured out was good for David Almond is apparently not what Florida's Republican Party loons have worked out in regard to their own wayward maniac, Rep. Bob Allen, a situation that is further complicated by the fact that he is the co-chairman of John "Gay Sweaters" McCain's Florida presidential campaign. The short version: McCain's man in Florida was soliciting sex from males in a public toilet-- a very very Republican activity; just ask Idaho Senator Larry Craig) when he wound up stalking a plain clothes policeman and offering him $20 in return for sucking on the law official's member. He was arrested and booked and is now saying he is innocent. PageOneQ has all the sordid details-- and they are sordid-- and a photocopy of the arrest documents.

On top of the gay sweaters incident Bob Allen's circus is proving to be a horrifying embarrassment to the little that is left of a John McCain campaign. Allen says he will not resign and that this whole incident is "ugly."

His attorney, Philip Lupo, said Allen would plead not guilty to solicitation of prostitution. The charge is a second-degree misdemeanor punishable by up to a year in the county jail and a $500 fine.

Allen was arrested outside the men's restroom at a Titusville park after offering to perform a sex act on a plainclothes police officer, authorities said. He was later released after posting $500 bail.

Titusville Officer Danny Kavanaugh, who was staking out a nearby condo hoping to catch a burglar, said Allen approached him in the men's bathroom at Veterans Memorial Park about 3:30 p.m. Wednesday.

In an arrest affidavit, Kavanaugh said he had washed his hands and, finding the sink's paper-towel dispenser empty, had walked into a stall for the disabled to dry his hands. Allen first peeked over the door and then stepped inside, he said.

Allen proposed the two go across a nearby bridge because "it's quiet over there" and he would perform a sex act on the officer for $20, the affidavit said. They walked to Allen's car, where the officer identified himself and arrested Allen.

Reaction among Allen's fellow Republicans was cautious.

Rep. Mitch Needelman, R-Melbourne, said the allegations held "severe moral implications."

"For the foreseeable future, Rep. Allen needs to put his political career on hold," Needelman said. "I have concerns for his family."

House Speaker Marco Rubio said in a statement that, "The charge against Rep. Allen is serious." But because it's a misdemeanor, he added, a guilty verdict would not require Allen to resign. Asked in Miami about the arrest, Gov. Charlie Crist said, "It just seems sad and tragic."

Crist is also a somewhat closeted homosexual but, unlike Allen, he has not made a career out of victimizing gay people. Allen "sponsored legislation that toughened penalties for lewd or lascivious conduct and created a new provision that allows some sexual predators to receive life prison sentences for their offenses. Allen had dubbed the bill the 'Sexual Predator Elimination Act.'" Now that would really put an end to the Republican Party!

UPDATE: WILL JIM DeMINT BE NEXT?

Although at the moment the more racist of South Carolina's two far right Republican senators, Jim DeMint, is fighting it out with GOP closet case Mitch McConnell over who will run the Republican Senate caucus, he took some time out to worry about his ally David Vitter, like DeMint a xenophobic maniac.

Reacting to the revelation that Sen. David Vitter, R-La., patronized brothels and call girls, DeMint told Chad Pergram of the Capitol News Connection radio service, “I think all of us have to look at it and say, ‘We can be next. … This can be a very lonely and isolating place.’ I’m fairly surprised at how little it does happen.”

Howie Klein was president of his freshman class, drove to Afghanistan and Nepal, became the president of Reprise Records and started a blog called Down With Tyranny!. He's always hated tyrants.

http://www.alternet.org/


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